PROMETHEAN ANTAGONIST

'A brief hiatus. I'll leave this up a week or so before my next posting

1. “There is no Terrorist Threat” (Michael Moore actually said that);
If someone screaming “Ala a Akbar” tries to kill you, your family, or fellow citizens, its not because they’re part of a fanatical religious sect and political ideology. It’s because of misunderstood root causes like poverty and imperialism. This is also why peasants in Guatemala scream “Ala a Akbar” and try to kill random people.

2. A jet almost fully loaded with fuel and flying at maximum speed will do little damage to a skyscraper constructed of thin aluminum exo-structure. That’s why a mysterious “pod” is required to be visible beneath such a plane if one hopes to kill 3000 of one’s fellow citizens – to start an unpopular war and get oil. (To be further convincing, remember to not get said oil).

3. During the Vietnam war, Jane Fonda went to the totalitarian enemy’s country and posed behind the Soviet anti-aircraft guns that regularly shot down U.S. pilots – she wasn’t tried for treason and she was and remains wealthy and – to some – influential. …None the less, the U.S. stifles free speech and is, in fact, a fascist dictatorship.

4. America is a decadent immoral country and Oliver Stone, Quentin Tarantino, and Hollywood in general will continue to make movies that prove it. Also, though both are opposed to violence, when they make a film, they're kind of into the concept – for "art" of course.

5. Politicians, lawyers, and bureaucrats – although you may have never met them personally -- care about you very much. But, you can only expect their continued help and assistance if you give them more power, give them more money, and help to make more of them. You will be happier when you learn to obey – ‘group hug, now goddammit!

7. Americans must learn to cooperate ® more…and such cooperation should be in accordance with a socialist government’s decrees. Love your fellow numbers!

8. The Earth’s temperature is becoming more moderate and average and weather will soon bore us into extinction “as a species” (as opposed to extinction as just plain folks).

9. The Earth is cooling and we’re all going to freeze our asses off in June. The Earth is warming and we’re all going to roast in February. It’s better that farmers thrive In Iowa and not Greenland or Siberia.

10. Bush is Hitler. He once owned a baseball team to conjure an image of passive simplicity to cover his true nature as a bloodthirsty tyrant and orchestrator of mass murder. He knew that he could secure power, fame, respect, admiration, and historical greatness by offending leftists through his plots to remove fascist dictators from power.

11. Bush is Hitler, part II: Anyone who agrees with Bush, such as former British Prime Minister Tony Blair or former Australian Prime Minister John Howard, are mere puppets of Bush – and they are thus not Hitler.

12.Bush is Hitler, part III; Bush is a fool who can’t think or speak effectively but possesses secret powers to mesmerize others into doing his will (this includes United States congress' members of both parties who voted to remove Saddam Hussein from power if he refused to adequately prove he had stopped production and planing of mass-destruction weapon programs.

13. Stop the genocide! …But, if a Muslim leader calls for the elimination of Israel – one free pass (because they’re "Zionists!"). Also, there was no holocaust.

14. The communists of various countries in the past century really didn’t kill, imprison, or enslave over 100,000,000 people to build an egalitarian paradise. The only people who kill tens of thousands or millions of people are businessmen, people who go to Christian Churches on Sunday, or viewers of Fox News.

15. Noam Chomsky, Howard Zinn, Michael Moore, et al. are heroes being persecuted for speaking the truth or for having their work mandatory reading or viewing in classrooms throughout the United States. Their wealth and influence is incidental and not worthy of consideration in debate on the issue of media variety in a free society. Their status is the result of being silenced.

16. If you have a degree in literature, womans’ studies, or transgender eco-feminist anti-imperialist studies (or if you play a guitar well) you are extra smart and we should do what you tell us to do. Those who disagree or like America, free society, and individuality are fascists extreme ultra-right wing imperialists and must be reeducated for the common good (inc.).

17. America should be “multi-lateral” and cooperate with our “friends” (they can still be considered friends even if they hate us and will our demise). Considering our own security, prosperity, and cultural vitality is not an option – though we should help our enemies to advance their position (the Carter Doctrine).

18. It makes perfect sense for a middle class person who went to a good college and who owns a nice home, nice car and furniture, who owns investments, who owns the latest in technical gadgetry, and who has traveled around the world, to despise a free market system and to hate "materialism." It also makes perfect sense that such well-off people should wish that others who have the same things in greater quantity have it confiscated from them. Really, this makes perfect sense!

19. The government is bad...but we need a stronger, larger, and more centralized government because free and independent citizens are worse (especially if they are wealthy or disagree with the truthT.M.).

20. People should be allowed to do what they choose as long as they do what they are told by politicians, bureaucrats, and intellectual armchair philosophers.

21. Although most radical socialist s are at least middle class (if not outright wealthy), their status and life condition allows them to identify particularly with the poor and downtrodden.

22. Hitler is Bush. Adolf Hitler was actually a moderate Republican who opposed dictatorships and sought to foster the development of freely elected governments. The National Socialists' hatred of capitalism was a clever disguise to hide the fact that they really liked capitalism.

23. Bush secretly stopped the highly effective Kyoto treaty...while he was governor of Texas. Mysteriously, he was able to do this as the U.S congress voted unanimously against Kyoto...under President Clinton.

24. Though global average temperature has increased less than one degree over the last 100 years, the Kyoto treaty could potentially reverse this trend and possibly reduce average global temperature less than one degree during the next 100 years. The fact that it further channels authority and sovereignty from individuals and nations to international bureaucrats is of no concern. Also, the Wizard of Oz really is a wizard.

25. Bush is Genghis Khan. He sometimes rides a horse.

26. While the U.S. unemployment rate is consistently about half that of France's, socialist policies in France are a more effective way of dealing with unemployment.

27. Che Guevara really was a great statesman. This is clearly proved by the fact that his face appears on many T-shirts (and, summary executions are okay if the people killed include small shop-keepers, farmers, and assorted "counter-revolutionaries").

28. You sometimes have to break some eggs to make an omelet. But, who cares about omelets really, lets just break some eggs!

# posted by Promethean Antagonist @ 10:43 PM